Saturday, April 15, 2006

I don't know what the future holds. In fact I never did, it just seemed that way at the time. You go through life expecting certain things to just be. The sun will come up in the morning, spring will follow winter, and you will come home to your husband each night, and your Dad and Mom will be there tomorrow for you to consult whenever you want.

Recent health problems have ripped away that false sense of security. My dad may not be here 10 more minutes, much less ten years. This has been the truth every day of my life, but it has never seemed real before. Is that all bad? I'm not sure. Getting through the day with a false sense of security seems infinitely preferable to spending each and every day in uncertainty.

The real test is learning to trust in the face of uncertainty. What is certain is that the death rate for parents, for us and for children is 100%. What is certain is that God is good. Death is part of that goodness, because in our current state, we are doomed to an eternity of sin. Were it not for grace and the great message of Good Friday and of Easter, we would be doomed to an eternity of sin, violence, seperation and loneliness, of striving for things we could never have. Were it not for death, Adam and Eve would have spent an eternity in their fallen state, with no hope of regaining their intimacy with God. All mankind would have been doomed with them.

It is grace and mercy then that allows death. Without death and resurrection, how would we be reconciled with God?

An Eternity awaits my father. One moment he will be in the broken body he has so long been shackled to, the next he will be in eternity, face to face with God, welcomed as a good and faithful servant. For him, there will be no moment when he will be absent from me, for if there is never less time to come than there was, how will he register that I am not there?

One day, at some time in the future, I will make my transfer from this world to the next, and there will meet all those who have gone before me. I too shall have no less time ever. and I shall not have the neurosis that have plagued me throughout my life. My flaws shall be no more. I shall know God in his fullness. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

Easter is such a blessed time. It is a time to remember the price that was paid, and to remember that Jesus, who was crucified, did not remain in the tomb, but once the price was paid, was raised up. This is the quality seal on the sacrifice. This was God's stamp of approval on the payment. Paid in Full.